how can communication save time, energy and bring unexpected seasonal gifts?

Listening effectively saves your time as well as those around you and can help you get more energy and achieve more!
In my work as a time management I often work with men. Although they have often achieved a great deal in their business lives, when they talk about their wives there seems to be an assumption that they need to compromise and ‘put up with’ certain behaviour in order to have a happy life. This can include what we they often call ‘nagging’ or being ‘henpecked!’
People in general and husbands in particular often complain about how their partners repeat themselves and continually bring up the same issues.
So what does makes us repeat ourselves? We tend to repeat ourselves when we don’t feel heard!
So if someone we know tends to repeat themselves and we never feel like we can move on, one approach we can take, rather than to stop listening is to listen differently.
It may seem like we are putting our own needs to one side, but actually it is another way of asserting ourselves and can mean we create opportunities to persuade, influence and get our point across.
Experiment with listening differently just for 10 minutes and see what happens! The main key is to really show that you are trying to understand what the other person is saying and show that you have heard. This sounds so simple and almost simplistic but it can dramatically change relationships and save everyone time.
One couple I worked with came to see me for help with anger management. They both felt that he had problems with anger that needed to be addressed. However they both also acknowledged that she ‘nagged’ him, but didn't see that as a problem or in any way related to his anger. I saw them both together and separately. When I saw him individually he said that he got angry because when he came home from work he was often really tired and yet she ‘nagged’ at him to do work around the house. He felt he did a lot already but she didn’t seem to acknowledge it.
When I saw her separately I suggested that she try some different communication techniques. The next time I saw him he said that they were getting on better, he wasn't sure what had changed but she was no longer nagging him so much. As a result, he found he more energy when he came home from work and was actually helping her more around the house. The anger issues were very deep and complex and took some time to work through individually, but by providing some first-aid in the form of communication tools and techniques to both partners allowed them to get on with their relationship, and get more out of their time and life together, while some of the more deeper issues were healed.
Listening and communication skills really do help you save time and could bring other unexpected gifts to your relationship!